It was a beautiful spring day. The sunrays penetrated the leaves of the trees. The birds hidden in the thicket were singing beautiful tunes. In the distance you could hear a rhythmic clatter of the woodpecker's beak hitting a tree trunk.
A small armed cortege was following the forest path. In the vanguard rode a proud young knight. His wheat-colour hair gleamed in the sunshine. He was wearing in blue wams with a lily embroidered with a golden strand on his chest. A similar lily flickered on his coat. A sword with a beautiful blue stone in the hilt was strapped to his side.
Suddenly something rustled in roadside bushes. The knight's stallion got frightened and reared. The golden-hair good-looker quickly restrained the animal. After a moment, he almost got as scared as his horse. From behind the bushes something came that made his heart palpitate. A shapeless creature, dressed in dirty tatters with a tangle of something that was once its hair. On its nose it had a pea-sized wart. It was standing using a walking stick, looking at the young man with its faded irises.
"You pretty" she said to the young man.
“Who are you, old woman?” asked the knight looking down at her with visible disgust.
“Your future wife, my Knight of the Golden Lily.”
She was answered by a loud laugh of a knight's esquire who came up with the suite to his master.
„Old woman, how may I help you?” the knight behaved in accordance with the code, which required to help to the needy and especially the needy women.
“Sure. I want only one thing from you - my Knight of the Golden Lily...”
“What is it?”
“Have you lost your mind?! Do you not see who you are dealing with?” asked the knight’s page aggressively.
“Of course I do and your master suits me well to be my spouse.”
"I guess you must be creasy" said the page.
“Why you think so? Because I’m old and ugly?” the sweat hog took akimbo.
"Ugly, that's hardly said" murmured the page.
"Gerard, take it easy" the knight rebuked him.
“People cannot be judged by appearances” the old woman continued in agitation. “Looking at your golden, curly curls, the Knight of the Golden Lily, I could say that you are stupid and vain...”
“Why? You do not know me?”
“You do not know me too. How do you know who I really am? You judge me just by my look.”
The knight thought about this rhetoric.
"You're right, grandmother" he said finally and then dismounted his horse.
“My Lord, what are you doing? She could be a witch or a mad one?!” the esquire got scared.
"And you're gay" said the old woman.
“I am not gay!”
"Neither am I a hag nor a madwoman.”
“Well, grandma, tell me how I can help you because it's time to go” the knight interrupted approaching the woman.
“Urgh. How nicely you move and how big you are. I want you” the old woman licked her parched lips.
“My lady! ...”
“Why not? I will be a good wife. Even if sometimes you scope out another one, I will not remonstrate you. You can ride to wars or other tildes. I will be waiting at home politely... but not in a chastity belt. I have allergy on metal...”
“I did say that she is the witch!” shouted the page. “You are probably also allergic to holy water!”
“Yes because I do not like clergy but for this one who is going to preside over our wedding I will be nice” she smiled at the knight, showing three black teeth.
“Grandma, you have a silver penny here. Buy something to eat or something to wear” the knight took out a coin from the purse.
“Where, in the middle of the forest?”
“Okay, we'll pick up you to a nearest settlement.”
“Well, if you marry me there. Otherwise I'm not moving anywhere else.”
“Grandma, really I don’t know what to do with you?”
"Orgh, Let me enlighten you on this matter on our wedding night.”
The knight sighed heavily.
“My handsome, Golden Knight, do you not realise that I can be a cursed princess. The bad witch transformed me into this ugly shape because of jealousy of my beauty. I was roaming the forest looking for a good-hearted young man who would commiserate with me and marry me in this form. Only in this way will the bad spell fall" said the old woman and the knight had the impression that her voice was less screeching and more sensual.
“She's lying!” interrupted the esquire.
“What if she is telling the truth?” The knight began to hesitate.
“So what! Are there not other pretty girls in the world? My Lord, let someone else save her from oppression.”
“But it not the right think to do. Honour does not let me leave the lady in need.”
“What lady? The old crock.”
"Gerard, because you are so unkind and I see you have not learned the knight's code, you will take this venerable lady on your saddle.”
“My Lord, do not punish me like that, some vermin will jump on me!”
“Gerard, I will not repeat myself. Help the lady get in” that was talking, the knight skilfully jumped on his horse.
With big difficulty the page, accompanied by the laughter of the other traveling companions, pushed the old woman onto his settle. Then with visible, he sat behind her.
They arrived to a city in the gathering dusk. The knight drove all the way, not saying anything. Also Gerard didn‘t speak trying to catch air with his mouth because the old woman stanked worse than a horny old goat. The knight came to the church towering ower the main street.
„My Lord, what are you going to do now?“ the page was realy afraid.
„I was thinking all the way and decided to fulfill the wish of this woman“ replied the knight.
„My Lord!“ Gerard shouted.
"Help this woman dismount" the knight required with autoritative voice. „What's your name, nice one?“ He turned to the old woman.
- Old Yenta but you can call me Yenning.“
„Then - Yenning, let's fulfill our destiny.“
„My Lord, please stop this crazy situation. The codex refers to the help of women in need, and this one does not look like a woman and is full of fleas“ the page began to scratch nervously.
„I decided. I will not change my mind. It is not honorable.“
"That's very noble of your side, my love" said the old woman. „You will be rewarded for that.“
They went inside and it happened. They became husband and wife. At a nearby inn they ate a wedding dinner to the surprise and scandal of everyone who looked at them. After the meal, they went to a room upstairs.
“Yenning, when the bad spell goes?” asked the knight with a voice muffled by emotions.
“Well, it has just gone!” the old woman screeched.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, you simply got fooled. I'm not a stupid princess, I am just a nasty old witch. Your esquire was right... though he is still the gay. And now I invite you to my bed, it's time to fulfil your conjugal duty. I also want to have something from life.”